Life on Life’s Terms

I think living “Life on Life’s terms” is accepting whatever life throws at me and dealing with it the best I can. Using the tools I have learned from my 12 step program. Life has not been kind to me lately. Falling out of love with my active qualifier, Dad getting cancer and is terminal and now my sister has been arrested for drug possession of Crystal Meth. I suppose I could just give up and put the covers over my head. Yell and scream at God. But that would just make me feel worse. I knew this was coming with my sister. She has always been the black sheep in the family. She was very abusive to me when I was young. and an out of control teenager. She has been doing some type of drug since she was a teenager, and has been addicted to crank for 25 years. I know that there is/was nothing I can do. Since she has been arrested it has been hard on my mom. She is having to deny her when she asks her to bail her out. She knows my sister will run and she will owe 10,000 bail. My sister has a disease and she will do anything to continue using . She has lied to my mom and I so many times. Why would we believe her now, when she says she won’t run? I knew that something like this was going to happen. She was either going to get arrested or die. I was hoping maybe she would get arrested because there is hope there she might get clean and healthy, before this drug kills her. My heart hurts for her children. They are in custody. That is really what is the hardest. My niece and nephew have been taken by the state. I have to accept that I can not do anything. I don’t have the money to go get them because I went to see my dad. That in itself must be for a reason. I’m glad I already went and saw my dad. I would hate to have to choose between the two. So I am accepting life on lives terms and I am praying. I know this is for a reason. I do hope she will get clean but if not there is nothing I can do about it. I accept that.