Limits

As I grow in my own program there are still people in my life that are not working on getting well. People I met that are not working program and I am starting to pull away from them for my own well being. I’m trying to do this in a loving and healthy way. So, I think it’s time to do some work on boundaries. Part of being codependent and in alanon is that I have warped since of what a boundary is or non at all. And I’m not sure how to set boundaries. I have been reading about how to do this, set a boundary . I have no clue how to do it and wouldn’t know where to start. I have been doing my enabling so long it’s all I know how to do. I am learning that you can’t set a boundary and take care of another’s feelings at the same time That a boundary is a limit. I tend to be really angry when I have finally had enough and set a boundary. Guess that is an unhealthy way of setting boundaries. I wish I had a Cyrano de Bergerac that could whisper in my ear how to set a boundary that is not all convoluted with enabling and dependency. I’m going to go put a prayer in my prayer box asking god to help me set boundaries because I have no clue how to do it. What I do know is that I can tell when something feels yucky now. That means I’m understanding what I don’t want. But guilt sets in sometimes when I try to take care of my emotional self. I ask god to take the guilt away. It’s the only thing I know to do this early in my recovery.